


dean and castiel's excellent cockles love story

by casdoms (moffwithhishead)



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Actor AU, Actor Castiel, Actor Dean, I am really bad at naming fics holy shit, M/M, never again god damn it, remember that one time I got that idea about a charliejo au and it turned into this
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-04-24
Updated: 2014-04-24
Packaged: 2018-01-20 14:52:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,569
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1514489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moffwithhishead/pseuds/casdoms
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>BASICALLY I got peer-pressured into writing something to go along with <a href="http://lovelydean.tumblr.com/post/83143792231/au-dean-winchester-and-castiel-novak-are-two-of">this</a> and <a href="http://lovelydean.tumblr.com/post/83053469615/au-charlie-bradbury-is-one-of-hollywoods-most">this</a>. </p><p> </p><p>  <i>"I…" Dean hiccuped again and leaned closer to Cas as he slurred, "I have the bigggest crush on youuuuuuuuuuuuuu. God, Cas, y’re like… sex. On fuckin’…" His hands gestured up and down nonsensically, "Muscu’lar fuckin ass kickin thick thighs."</i></p><p> </p><p>  <i>(Dean has no memory of the rest of their conversation but Cas swears that he said something about wanting to come on his thighs and also, word-for-word, “I want to ride so hard that they don’ call it a reverse cowgirl anymore, they call it a reverse Dean.”)</i></p>
            </blockquote>





	dean and castiel's excellent cockles love story

**Author's Note:**

> do you ever have [an idea](http://lovelydean.tumblr.com/post/83053469615/au-charlie-bradbury-is-one-of-hollywoods-most) and you're like "WOW YES THIS IS A GREAT IDEA I SHOULD DO THIS IDEA" and then you do the idea and it spawns [another idea](http://lovelydean.tumblr.com/post/83143792231/au-dean-winchester-and-castiel-novak-are-two-of) and THAT idea blows up in your face?
> 
> ha  
> ha  
> ha  
>  ** _never again._**

See, this whole mess started four years ago when Dean got his first big movie role and still wasn’t out of the closet.

He loved Benny, honestly he did, but this movie was forecasted to be a Big Fucking Deal and neither one of them were ready to come out to the entire world. So Jo, who had been trying to break into the industry for a few years, suggested this: that her and Dean pretend to date.

They go on a few ‘dates’ for the paparazzi that were now following Dean to document, they kiss in front of cameras, they walk the red carpets together, they hold hands - it was simple and easy for two years. It worked really fucking well. They were accommodating with the press and because of that, the paparazzi would scram if they asked them to.

Dean didn’t have to come out to the whole world, Jo didn’t have to come out to her mom and they helped further each others careers. When Dean’s took off as an action/superhero movie star, he was able to use that credibility to get Jo leading roles in more serious indie movies.

The point? Life was good. Life was easy and simple and Dean could date whoever the hell he wanted without having to worry… and then he met Castiel Novak and that all got shot to hell.

* * *

Dean has one rule for life: he doesn’t date actors. He doesn’t date other people in the industry.

Most of them are vapid and shallow and the girls are all obsessed with their weight and working out while the guys are all closeted and obsessed with their weight and working out - it’s just not really anything that interests Dean. He’s not a complicated man, it doesn’t take a lot to make him happy, but he wants someone that he can have a real conversation with. And apart from Charlie, his co-star in his last movie that is a Giant Lesbian, he had yet to meet another actor that met his needs.

So when he showed up on set to visit Jo at one of her first leading roles and saw the guy that was starring opposite of her, he ignored the butterflies in his stomach.

When Castiel (or ‘Cas’ as Jo called him) came over to introduce himself after the first scene wrapped, all smiles even in his stupid costume, Dean pretended he wasn’t acting like a thirteen year old girl standing next to that one kid from One Direction. And when Cas set a hand on his shoulder and said that he hoped he’d be seeing Dean around some more, Dean was adamant that he didn’t feel his heart skip a beat.

Nope. That never happened.

Jo knew, though. That’s the annoying thing about Jo, and ‘dating’ her, it’s that she knows everything.

"So," she’d grinned and bumped their shoulders together as they walked back to her trailer after that first conversation with Cas, "You like him." It wasn’t a question, it was a statement of facts. Dean was a giant thirteen year old girl with a crush and they both knew it.

"What?!" He squeaked out and flailed his arms around defiantly, "I do not!"

He totally did. He blushed and rolled his eyes at Jo’s teasing, denying it every time it was brought up over the next few weeks, but he still showed up to set every day to visit. He still brought Jo and Cas coffee, just to give himself an excuse to talk to the other man, and he still blushed whenever Cas touched him. It was pathetic. He was pathetic.

"Ohhhhh," Benny had laughed at their weekly poker night when Charlie showed him a picture of Cas after Dean couldn’t stop talking about this ‘stupid fucking god damn ugly ass sweater’ that the costume department had him wear, "Brother, you got it baaaaaad."

Dean’s pretty sure he’ll remember his response to that for the rest of his life - “He’s attractive, sure, but he’s also an actor. He’s probably straight. I don’t date actors, remember?”

Yeah, he’d live to eat those words.

* * *

If meeting Cas was when everything got shot to hell, then the wrap party for the movie he and Jo worked on was the night everything went to hell in a hand basket.

Dean’s a handsy drunk. He’s also a flirty drunk.

Put two glasses of whiskey and six shots of something that some PA handed him together with Cas in a tux and it’s a baaaad combination for someone who’s supposed to be straight and madly in love with someone who’s not a tall, dark-haired blue-eyed sex god.

He’d stumbled over to Cas and bumped into the slightly shorter man, grinning as he felt strong hands grip his waist to keep him upright, “Hey Cas…”

"Hello to you too, Dean."

The answering grin he received was enough for Dean’s drunk brain to decide on the next stupid course of action.

"Hey," Dean mumbled as he wrapped an arm around Cas’ shoulders and stood awkwardly close to his ear, "Wan’ -" he hiccuped "-know a s’cret?"

Castiel had laughed and snaked an arm around Dean’s waist cautiously to help support him because the other man was barely standing by himself, “Something tells me that I’m going to hear the secret whether I want to or not.”

"I…" Dean hiccuped again and leaned closer to Cas as he slurred, "I have the bigggest crush on youuuuuuuuuuuuuu. God, Cas, y’re like… sex. On fuckin’…" His hands gestured up and down nonsensically, "Muscu’lar fuckin ass kickin thick thighs."

(Dean has no memory of the rest of their conversation but Cas swears that he said something about wanting to come on his thighs and also, word-for-word, “I want to ride so hard that they don’ call it a reverse cowgirl anymore, they call it a reverse Dean.”)

(He’s kind of glad he doesn’t remember that.)

And the next morning he’d woken up in the back seat of his car, fully clothed, hungover as fuck and alone with a note that had Cas’ phone number on it and a note.

"Dean -   
Call me when you’re sober. I think we should talk.  
xx Cas  
p.s. no we didn’t have sex last night, stop worrying.”

So later that morning when he didn’t feel dead he’d picked up his phone, naturally, and called Cas to apologize for whatever the hell happened.

"Hey man," Dean had mumbled and rubbed a hand over his face when Cas picked up, "Listen, about last night, I’m really sorry if I said or did anything that made you uncomfortable or was inappropriate…" He’d gone into his default deflection mode that he normally used with his publicist, "Jo and I had a fight and I was in kind of a bad place."

He hadn’t been expecting Cas to snort so derisively and say, “That’s funny because you told me you loved me last night and that you wish ‘fanfics’ could happen because you wanted to carry my babies.”

In Dean’s life there have only been two moments that were more embarrassing than that one - the time when his mom walked in on him jerking off to gay porn for the first time and when he’d tried to make a move on Charlie two weeks after meeting her and ended up humiliating himself in front of the whole crew. And Sam. That had been fun.

"I…" He groaned a little, "I don’t really know what to say to that."

"You could have drinks with me," Castiel had suggested and Dean didn’t even have to see him to know that the son of a bitch was smirking. "I mean," he’d continued very seriously, "If we are going to procreate we should at least get to know each other better, Dean Winchester."

Dean laughed and they ended up talking for two hours about nothing while he laid in the back of the Impala in a studio parking lot on a Sunday morning. And they agreed to a date that night.

* * *

"You kissed?" Jo asked incredulously while they were eating lunch in one of LA’s most popular restaurants with a whole shit ton of photographers across the street taking their pictures.

They were smiling, of course. They had to be smiling.

"We kissed," Dean had shrugged and took a sip of his beer, faking a laugh. "What? Are you mad?"

Jo rolled her eyes and didn’t have to fake a laugh that time, “No, you moron, I just can’t believe that’s all you did! I mean you’re both so into each other it’s kind of-“

Dean remembers feeling like the air had suddenly been sucked out of the room when she said that. He remembers the world freezing around them and everything narrowing down to Jo’s face as he stopped her ranting about something (them, probably, his brain supplied after a moment), “Wait, what do you mean we’re both into each other?”

She’d grinned the same way she always did when she got a role that she hadn’t told Dean about and he’d felt his heart stop for a moment.

"You mean you don’t know?"

Apparently Cas had been asking people (namely Jo) about Dean since they met that first day on set. He’d been trying to find out as much as he could about Dean.

Jo talked for a good fifteen minutes about it but Dean had stopped listening because holy shit, Cas liked him. Cas maybe liked him as much as he liked Cas. That was… fuck, that was amazing.

Or terrible. Possibly both.

"Dean," Jo’s hand was waving in front of his face, like she had been trying to get his attention for a while. "You okay?"

He remembers feeling like his brain shut down except for one thing: find Cas.

"I have to…" Dean stood up quickly and kissed Jo out of habit, hoping that it would buy him some time away from the paparazzi, "Sorry."

He remembers sprinting out of the restaurant and over to the valet, briefly hoping that Jo would be able to get a ride home. He remembers speeding away from the building, driving on autopilot back towards Cas’ house. The same house he’d been in last night.

The same house where he’d told Cas he wasn’t interested. That he was straight. That this had all just been a misunderstanding.

Jesus, he’s such an idiot.

* * *

"Dean," Cas was an amazing actor but he hadn’t been able to hide his surprise when he opened the door, "What are you doing here?"

He didn’t wait for an answer. They were in a gated community and there was a twelve foot fence around the front of Cas’ house. Nobody could see them.

So he had stepped forward and pulled the other man into a kiss. He hadn’t been paying attention last night. He’d panicked and pushed Cas away. He didn’t even remember what Cas tasted like or what his tongue felt like - he remembers feeling like he had to rectify that that very moment. The rest could come later.

He hadn’t been expecting Cas to push him away. He hadn’t expected Cas to be angry.

"What the hell do you think you’re doing?"

Cas had pulled them inside the house and slammed the door behind them before spinning around and yelling at Dean, “I am not going to be your big gay freak out! I am not some tool that you can just fuck and then forget about!”

"Cas," Dean doesn’t remember ever being so scared in his life, "Cas, I can explain -"

"No!" The other man had yelled and before Dean had time to blink, Cas had been right in his space, pinning him against a wall and growling, "You said you were straight, that you weren’t interested. You said you were in love with me the other night. You let me kiss you. You pushed me away."

There will never be a day when Dean won’t hate himself for the tears that had been in Cas’ eyes.

"So you have two choices here, Dean Winchester," Cas’ voice had gone eerily calm despite the fact that he was crying, "You can commit to this or you can walk away and forget any of this ever happened. Because I don’t date. But I really fucking like you, okay? So if you want this, I am in. I am all in."

Have you ever had a moment where you feel like everything is hanging in the balance? Like if you make one wrong move, you’ll be miserable for the rest of your life?

Like your life’s happiness hinges on one choice you make in a moment?

Yeah, this had been that moment for Dean.

"I want this," Dean had breathed out quickly, snaking an arm around the other man’s waist to keep him there because he was genuinely scared that he’d disappear if he let go. "I want you. I… christ, Cas, I’ve wanted you since the moment I met you."

Cas’ face had morphed into something that resembled hurt more than anger, “Then why…?”

He hadn’t needed to ask what Cas meant.

"Because I’m chicken shit," he’d laughed quietly, "Because I don’t do this. I don’t… I don’t fall for other actors. I don’t do reckless shit like kiss another guy on the front porch, okay? I don’t… I don’t fall in love with people who could fuck everything up for me."

Cas had relaxed at that point. He’d pulled Dean closer and rested their foreheads together, “I don’t want to fuck anything up for you. I just want you, Dean.”

"I want you too," Dean had assured him, kissing at the corner of his mouth gently, not wanting to scare him off.

They made love that night for the first time in Cas’ bed, the whole room lit only by the moonlight. The only noises had been their own - skin on skin and murmured words of encouragement and love. It was the best night of Dean’s life.

* * *

Fast forward two years and Dean got the call he’d been dreaming about since he was a little kid - he was being offered the chance to play Captain America. He hadn’t hesitated for a moment. He’d said yes before he even called his manager to ask.

He found out who was going to be playing his Bucky two nights later when he was laying in bed with Cas, tracing out the freckles on his back absently. “So… we’re going to be in a movie together…”

Cas smiled to himself and twined his fingers with Dean’s before bringing their joined hands up to kiss the other man’s knuckles, “Is that a problem?”

"Having a real, legitimate excuse to see you every day?" Dean grinned and chuckled as he nuzzled into the nape of Cas’ neck, "How could that ever be a problem, baby?"

"We’ll have to be careful," Cas said quietly as he scooted closer to Dean and closed his eyes.

"Mmmm," the other man hummed and kissed the side of his boyfriend’s neck, "I’m up for the challenge. Are you scared or somethin’?"

He felt the smile against his arm as Cas shook his head, “Not scared. Just don’t want you to feel uncomfortable or anything…”

They didn’t talk about it. The fact that neither one of them was Out in the press. And they definitely didn’t talk about the fact that Dean was more than a little terrified that coming out publicly would hurt his career.

Dean knew that if they came out as a couple now it would overshadow the movie - and this was important to him, he didn’t want to fuck it up.

But… but he wanted to tell the world about them. He wanted to walk out to the front of the neighborhood and scream at the top of his lungs that he was madly in love with Castiel Novak and he didn’t give a damn who knew about it. He wanted to kiss the love of his life with all those paparazzo’s watching and he wanted them to take a picture of it.

They couldn’t though. Not yet.

"We’ll figure it out, Cas," he promised quietly as he tightened his arms around the other man and closed his eyes, "We’ll figure it out, okay?"

* * *

"So," Jo let out a breath as she sat down across from Dean at Cas’ dining room table (their dining room table?) and gripped the cup of coffee in front of her with both hands. "We need to talk."

Dean laughed and grinned over at her as he sipped his coffee, “You’re not breaking up with me, are you?”

The awkward pause that followed was enough for Dean’s eyes to grow large as he set his coffee down, “Holy shit, you’re breaking up with me.”

"I…" Jo looked away guiltily and bit her lip, "…it’s not you, it’s me?"

"You know, you’re a terrible actor in real life," Cas said as he walked over to the table and took the free seat with his cup of coffee in his hand. He studied her for a moment before arching an eyebrow and asking quietly, "It’s Charlie, isn’t it?"

"Yeah," she admitted sheepishly, deflating a little and relaxing back in her seat, "We sorta…"

"You hooked up," Dean supplied for her and sighed as he ran a hand through his hair. "You… Jo, are you sure you want to go public with it?"

The laugh surprised him.

"Dean," she grinned a little across the table at him, "We haven’t even started the press tour yet and everybody won’t stop asking me about our relationship. I mean we’re not gonna come out tomorrow or anything but maybe… you know…" Jo shrugged with a small, private smile on her face, "Someday…"

He couldn’t say no to that.

* * *

They had Sam leak it to the press.

It was easy enough. People believed it. They both got people trying to comfort them at parties and such. Their managers believed it. Their costars gave them sympathetic looks. They were fine, though. They were both happy in other relationships… It was the press that was hard to deal with.

And it’s not like the leaked pictures of them having sex on set made it any easier to deal with.

Sam and Bobby figured out who the crew-member was that leaked the photos to the press and got their ass fired. Dean would feel worse about the fact that they were going to have to Vancouver to find another job but the guy was a dick anyway.

But still, they dealt with it. They adapted and deflected, just like they’d taught themselves to over the last couple years.

Cas handled it all beautifully, giving non-answers and making reporters forget what they were even talking about in that special charmingly awkward way of his. Jo just laughed everything off, making jokes when she could and ignoring it when she couldn’t. Charlie, as always, was good at deflecting. She could give Cas a run for his money.

Dean though… Dean had a little bit of a harder time with it.

He wanted to tell them the truth.

He wanted to come out to the press and he wanted to parade their relationship around the premieres they had to go to. Dean wanted the same relationship with Cas that he had with Jo.

They never talked about it but he knew it hurt Cas to have to hide it. And he was tired of hurting the man that he loves. 

So maybe that ‘accidental’ slip at the Comic con screening of the movie hadn’t been so accidental. 

* * *

"I was just wondering," the girl started hesitantly as she stood at the microphone and smiled up at them. "You and Castiel have such great chemistry… did you have to do much to prepare yourselves for the role?"

It was a good question. It was an innocent question. It was the perfect question to come out.

Dean smiled and tried to steady his breathing because it felt like his heart was going to beat right out of his chest. This was the moment he’d been waiting for. “Well, that’s a great question… you know, um… when you’ve been together for as long as Cas and I have I think it just gets easier to read one another’s cues and that makes acting together so much easier.” 

The whole room had gone dead silent and Dean was shocked that the girl who asked the question was the first one to speak up.

"I…" She opened her mouth a few times, floundering for a moment, "Did you just confirm that you and Castiel are dating?" 

He cringed and opened his mouth to say something, trying to play it off as genuine panic that he’d let it slip he was dating his very male costar, “I… um…” Dean swore as he looked over at Cas, who was laughing his ass off (because of  _course_  he knew what Dean was doing), “Sonovabitch.”

* * *

After that, there was no point in trying to hide it. It was out and so were they.

So when Cas snuck up behind him in the press line the next day and caressed his cheek as a reporter asked him if it was true, that they were really dating, Dean just laughed and grabbed Cas’ hand that was resting on his lower back.

"You know, I think this guy just confirmed that for you." 

 

**Author's Note:**

> [read it on tumblr](http://lovelydean.tumblr.com/post/83342692705/based-on-my-gifset-see-this-whole-mess-started)
> 
>  
> 
> (feel free to write your own version of the au and make it better but I'd love to see the story when you're done!!) :)


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